Written by Neil Levine
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Topics: Politics, Congress

Thursday, 23 March 2006

image for Juggling Dubious Politics In The Jugular Vein
Dubya's Dubai Shipwreck

Any Safe Port In A Nasty Political Storm---An investigative journalist for the National Inquisitor and the Starry Globe has unearthed the ultra secret reasons for the rejection of the Dubai world ports deal by the U.S. Congress.


"American elected officials don't like those kind of people. They don't pay taxes. They don't get out the vote. They don't offer no show jobs or make work propositions. Nor do they follow the Party Line," is what he has been told in confidence. "It's just a terribly wasted political situation where the ends are justifiably mean."


"Sad but true. Dubai is a dubious foreign government that does not play by American political rules and is therefore extremely suspicious in the eyes of American based political operatives and machine politicians. Dubyans used to like the Taliban. They still like to trade oil for money and they don't help the balance of payments. They have plenty of oil and not slicked up grease or pork rinds"


"You can't make them cow tow and bow wow," he reports.


"They're too far away and there is no justice in this world."


"It's just plain discrimination and discrimination is good politics when it lets folks yell and scream and stuff the ballot box."


George Dubya. Bush, in defense of his foreign policy, has complained that picking on dubious Dubai is not fair. "Indubitably, Dubai is ddoing double time with us and dubbing my initiatives into doobey, doobey doo moves, oobey doobee do! Their money is just as green as the grass local pot heads smoke and I can count on them not to make troubling domestic revelations."


"They have no mafia ties and our ports are already denominated in foreign currencies. So what is the big deal?"


"Get real," he complains to the political opposition.


"They whip heinies and notas just another flavoring of tough love," was the response of the opportunistic opposition made, and then they went on to make greater demands..

Senator Barbara Boxer said she would fight further friendly initiatives by the Administration using round houses and left jabs and Russ Feingold has announced he wants to censor the Republican forays into Democratic turf.


Man in the street interviews raised worries about fear and intimidation, not to mention fear of funky looking people. "People look suspicious wearing scarves over their heads," was the way one anonymous voter put it.


So what can George Dubya Bush do? Keep making nice and carry a big shtick. Or else? Or else what?


Simply or else!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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