Warning - This article contains profanity - whatever the fuck that is - in abundance. The Editorial team apologize like motherfuckers for that. Please accept our motherfuckin' editorial apologies. Ass holes...
Controversial West 'By God' Virginia priest and motorcycle gang member, Father Francois 'Just call me fuckin' Elvis, alright?' DuBois today announced:
"I ain't fuckin' quittin'! You think I'm some kind of loser, or what? Ass holes...."
DuBois, the controversial cleric with a nice line in 'poums' (poems - ed) announced that anybody who thought they'd seen the last of him, had better have a rapid rethink.
"Just when people think I'm done for, I come back, like a really fuckin' bad penny...exceptin' that I'm really one of the good guys. 'Ceptin a course when I'm bad..."
Fr DuBois has made a habit of hitting the headlines in recent years, with manic exploits, including knocking down Nelson's Column in London's Trafalgar Square, bagging a chupacabra and several killer rabbits in West 'By God' Virginia, and destroying several motorcycle gang members Harleys in a TV dispute in a roadside diner.
"It ain't me that's controversial," DuBois stated. "It's just that every other fucker is a crashing bore. People really should get into writing poums (poems - Ed) and hearing confessions. Some of these fucking Catholics crack me up. Still, they ain't half as funny as the Morons...sorry...Communists. Anyone fancy a beer? Not in a gay way, of course..."
Father Francois Dubois will be appearing in a one man show at Carnegie Hall in Trenton New Jersey from November up to Christmas, bail conditions permitting.
More as we get it.
Providing the wise guys, or the biker gangs don't get us first.