CAIRO, Egypt - The Arab League is preparing to send 20 monitors to ensure peace in the imminent Iowa Caucus and monitor the situation in case of trouble emerging.
According to Nabil El Araby, the General Secretary of the Arab League, "We are concerned like many in the world community that the Iowan voters are approaching the polls in a logical manner. We have been asked by a candidate, someone called Michele Bachmann, to step in and provide a trustworthy monitoring system to ensure her victory".
An advance team of four monitors is current en route to Des Moines from their base in Cairo. The leader of the Arab League team, Abdullah al-Senussi, is expected to arrive on the 2nd of January, providing that he is able to bribe his way out of the Libyan prison he is currently housed in. Al-Senussi (62) is the former head of Col Gaddafi's Intelligence Service and is considered to be "fair and just" according to Republican insiders.
The Arab League expects to produce a report immediately following the poll results. Alternatively, they are able to provide advance notice of the results on 2 Jan for those willing to offer $2M and above.