If you had plans to purchase the new biodegradable, eco-friendly, jackboot dreadlock wearing Barbie in time for Christmas, forget about it. The newest incarnation of Barbie, produced using recycled plastic in a sensible size 7 body type, was blocked at a dock in Seattle during a recent protest.
Environmental groups have been looking forward to this earth friendly doll all year. Polly Darton who recently gained fame lobbying Congress for free breast implants for poor women nicknamed the "pity titty," endorser of the doll regrets the delay.
"This new concept Barbie in keeping with the times, is a breath of fresh air for girls every where."
The differently able pre-adult Barbie comes from a disadvantaged economic class according to her bio. Instead of the traditional Barbie car this Barbie rides a bike and totes a sack lunch to school. Advertised as being a" sensible size 7" the P.C. Barbie is proportioned more realistically than her predecessors. Her bio also implies that instead of marrying Ken she plans to go to college first and get her degree.
Protestors on the docks blocked the delivery of the doll by defecating in mass on the pier thus preventing dockworkers from unloading the dolls. The EPA closed down the pier due to the fecal matter being a bio- hazard to the workers.
"In other words no dock worker was willing to walk thru shit for a doll," a spokesperson for the dockworkers said.
"Ironic that an eco-friendly toy's delivery is being blocked by a bio-hazard. Who would have thunk it?"