Pig Lick, Indiana: This just crossing news wires... Melinda Belle Piffle of this city contacted authorities when she opened her bedroom closet door and discovered three missing socks in the process of trans-mutating into wire clothes hangers.
Investigating officers learned from Miss Piffle that in recent months she had discovered several unmatched socks in her laundry. She also reported that wire clothes hangers seemed to be multiplying mysteriously in her closets.
Officers confiscated the "half hanger/half sock" thingies and other closet items for scientific analysis. Miss Piffle asked to be frisked and handcuffed but officers declined.
This writer will be in contact with Miss Piffle to conduct a controlled experiment in her closet to verify if missing socks somehow relate to the appearance of hangers. Handcuffs may be involved.