Written by Jean Le Fete
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Saturday, 22 October 2011

image for Republicans Hold Clown Congress at Circus Circus
Mit Romney pauses for the cameras

Las Vegas, Circ Du So lei set the stage For the Republican's debate to the tune of Send in the Clowns. Michelle Bachman, wearing her flying nun outfit, Ron Paul, Mitt Romney, Rick Perry and the rest of the candidates all flew in by wires over the audience to the stage for the debate.

Men in Blue then began drumming and all spotlights focused on one spot on the stage where debate moderator Wayne Newton rose on a pillar singing, "Danke Shoen".

All candidates were required to where bulb noses do to the Circus-Circus location. But this was a serious debate as announced by Wayne Newton. The following is a translated summary of the debate.

Cain accused Romney of deceptively juggling apples and oranges "mixing apples and oranges" when Romney and Perry from the high wire called Cain's 9-9-9 plan a farce as missed catching one another and dove to the net below adding a tax burden on Nevadans or anyone else who already pays a sales tax.

Cain explained, regardless of what happens during his daring cannon shot at the federal level, Romney will joke about how Americans would love to have a new tax -- and a george w. bushel of both apples and oranges.

Perry then swallowed and breathed fire of "hypocrisy" at Michelle Bachman for huffing and puffing to the beat of the Men in Blue. Yet nobody could control the border fight of illegal immigration at Mitt's home in Belmont, Massachusetts. A year later, Wayne Newton allowed a rebuttal and Perry scolded: "It's time for you to tell the truth, Mitt."

Just then Newt Gingrich lit a fart that tore into Romney for suggesting he came from the Heritage Foundation, a conservative think tank in Washington. Gingrich forced Romney to walk backwards on a tightrope, but he ran into Michelle Bachman bent over to tie her shoes. "That's a little broader. Keep going," said Gingrich, "This also reminds me of that article by that Texas woman, Real Leaders Tie Their Shoes.

Add it all up and you'll see that some of Romney's fellow presidential hopefuls are frustrated and fed up with his tendency to read the body language of llamas. It's clear that Romney's opponents would buy a used car from this man.

While some in the media cling to the narrative that Romney "looks presidential," the message sent by some of his opponents this week, as Wayne Newton sang, "Let It Be", to end the long evening, was simple and direct: buyer beware we all look like clowns.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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