DETROIT - Michele Bachmann's Hair Spray Across America Bus Tour rolled into the Motor City where she hopes to pick up some votes from unemployed auto workers who wouldn't mind having a female president.
As she spoke to a crowd of fourteen (14) that had gathered at a Walmart parking lot she told them that she knows that lots of people do not like her simply because they say that she's just like Sarah Palin but without the gunpowder smell.
She said that she gets it that her hairdo is nowhere near as nice as Rick Perry's or Mitt Romney's. She grinned and admitted that she also knows that in an arm wrestling match with the other seven GOP candidates that the only one she could probably beat is Ron Paul.
But Bachmann says that she wants the American people to know that there are other things that she can do beside sweep and mop the floors, bake biscuits, and walk with a pronounced swish.
A reporter with TV ClickerWorld asked her if it is true that she is a big fan of Dancing With The Stars.
Bachmann asked the reporter for her name.
"Sangria Wine" came the reply.
"Oh, like the alcoholic drink?"
"Ah no" Miss Wine smiled and added, "Like the 60s song by the Electric Prunes "One Gallon of Sangria Wine And She Was All Mine."
Wine then asked Bachmann if it was true that after watching Dancing With The Stars that she had voted for Chaz Bono.
Bachmann smiled and admitted that she had cause she felt Mr. Bono had danced the best.
Wine asked her if she knew that Chaz Bono is a transgender who was born female and had a sex change to become a male.
Bachmann got a stunned look. And her face actually turned as white as Marcia Cross of Desperate Housewives.
"Bbbbbut, he's so big and fat to ever have been a girl" she remarked.
Wine started laughing and asked her if she'd ever heard of Wynonna Judd, Carnie Wilson, Conchata Ferrell, or Gabourey Sidibe.
Bachmann was truly embarrassed. She told Miss Wine that she would certainly never vote for Chaz again and that she would probably vote for either Rob Kardashian or David Arquette who she is 99 percent certain were both born and still are males.
September 30 is National Chewing Gum Day, except in Arkansas and Kentucky where it is National Chewing Tobacco Day.