London (AP) - The royal family is said to be celebrating a Christmas first today. They are celebrating the marriage of their son Prince Charles to Camilla. Apparently the Queen has not been informed the her son was previously married. When informed of the news she said "I do not believe this. Its just not possible."
The Queen "cannot account" for her where-abouts for the past "30 years" she later admitted. She would not go into detail of why shee cannot recall those years. She then went on to admit that this is NOT a "Royal Christmas First".
Prince Charles was outraged when he was told that this is not a "Christmas First". "I have never been married. I don't know what you are talking about."
Charles denies all alligations of a previous marriage even though that last 30 years or more of his life has been documented.
"Are you on drugs Sir Charles?", a BBC reporter asked.
"Drugs?!? You bloddy fool! I never inhaled! Oh wait, that was Clinton. I must be going now!", exclaimed Prince Charles.
Despite the denial, and recent photos of both Prince Charles and Camilla, some are to believe that thay may be "smoking reffer", a secret MI-5 agent said.
The Queen has also been accused of drug use because of not being abole to "recall the past 30 years of her life."
"Its just all blank," the Queen said.
So far no drug charges will be filed on anyone in the Royal family.
"I am, however, disappointed that this is not a Christmas first," the Queen said.
Prince charles was later caught crying alledgedly "coming down" said Camilla.
Hopes are not down at Buckingham Palace though as they later forgot about the whole situation.
"This is going to be one hell of a bloddy hang-over we are going to have to deal with", said the Palace's Maids'.
Cleaning crews around London are on standy-by just in case reinforcements are needed.
During the live broadcast of the Queens annual Christmas address, she alledgedly started to "pass out" as the camera man put it.
When the address was over, she told the camera man "I am so plastered. I was bored by my own voice." she then left the room luaghing histarically.
"I did smell alcohol on her breath as she walked by me though," said the camera man. "Perhaps a little too much Christmas firsts I suppose."