Written by j.w.
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Topics: Libya

Tuesday, 30 August 2011

image for Briefing Papers on Libya found in Oilcan
Government Briefing Papers Revealed

A Minister - who cannot be named because he is involved with international development - inadvertly placed secret papers in a spare oil can and threw them in his dustbin.

A dustman - seeing the papers - knew where to take them. I told him several jokes as a reward (far better than the Sun's offer he told me) so I can reveal areas of the briefing paper briefly.

A rather abrupt section of the Briefing Paper is entitled 'Where's our Fucking Oil?' It goes on to describe all the efforts to get rid of Gadaffi and the aid given to the rebels/new government and reminds those attending the meeting to remember why we took the action we did.

'Clegg was not informed, left believing the junk about saving lives...but our oil reserves are not big enough and we need a drop in petrol prices for the next election' the paper reports succinctly.

A further remark will cause some friction in the Coalition. Under the heading Prospects for the Future we see 'Soon we can say goodbye to the Clegg/Cable act and what can they do? They will not get about enough votes to make a paper aeroplane, so stuff them.'

A Government aide would only say 'OOPS' when faced with these revelations.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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