Written by DancingJester
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Topics: London, cover

Thursday, 23 October 2003

image for Rare animal donated to London Zoo
Endangered Species ........

Last night under the cover of darkness a rare and endangered beast was delivered to a newly built, highly secret compound at the historic London zoo. Rumours have been circulating for months as to the purpose of the custom designed secure compound, officials from the zoo have been strangely reluctant to disclose details of this new tourist attraction. Early this morning intrepid Spoof report Thingamabob had an exclusive interview with the newly hired zoo keeper in charge of this project. This is what we learnt :

‘Firstly London Zoo would like to announce the opening of a new exhibit, initially only one member of this rare and endangered breed of animal will be on display, but in a ground breaking venture with San Diego zoo we are hoping that we will be able to display a breeding pair in all of their fornicating glory. Next we would like to explain out reticence with regards this project. The board of directors took the decision not to realise any information to the public for fear of jeopardising the entire project.'

After much harassing and the odd piece of hurled fruit the London Zoo spokesman finally told Mr. Thingamabob the details of the new exhibit:

‘We have in our possession one of only a handful of people that continue to trust the government. The reason we feel that this is so exciting is that, not only will we have the only other member of this group in captivity, San Diego having bagged one a couple of years back when they weren't so scarce. Also of course with the rapid decline of these animals in the wild is important, for the planet, that some are saved with the belief that hopefully they can be reintroduced in the wild when a suitable habitat for them is found.'

It is believed that the internal affairs branch of the government has donated massively towards this project. Neither Downing Street nor the London Zoo will confirm these allegations and when approached by Spoof the government refused to debate the issue with us, therefore we leave you with these last words from the London Zoo spokesman:

‘We urge you to come and visit our new exhibition, and support us in looking after this rare and majestic beast, if we can further the understanding of these creatures plight we may be able to slow down and even halt their extinction.'

Moving words indeed ….

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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