Written by Alex99
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Sunday, 10 July 2011

image for I'm Coming To Get You! Says Mystery Blonde
Close Up Of Mystery Blonde's Hair

A while back some guy in Japan wrote a story about a man who was picked at random to be famous for absolutely no reason. Just to be famous for existing on earth.

And guess what happened to him? He was featured on bill boards, televison and radio and the internet and absolutely everywhere. He had no privacy at all and was stalked day and night by silly papparazzos with nothing better to do than stalk people all the day and all the night and all into the next life. And before he knew it he had a fan club and people used to follow him along the street and yell stuff to him and try and be his best friend and number one darlinglys of all time and they used to ask him for money and ask him to go out for dinner.

It all stopped after the guy had got a sex transformation or gender reassignment and our guy/girl thought that he was safe and sound and secure and so very private that not even a mouse knew who he was. All perfect, right? Wrong!

Because yesterday our girl/guy was astonished to find out that she was famous all over again and for what? What had she done to deserve this intrusive nonsense? Imagine her horror when she read on the Spoof that a bunch of mad people were not only stalking her but writing about her as well. Is it really earth shattering news that she had taken a bus or had been seen around London or had eaten dinner and the answer had to be yes for some people in the spoofing universe.

Our mystery girl/guy is wondering what to do and is already considering taking out a super injunction to stop people like Lynton, Pixit and Skoob from writing about her ever again. And so she will just have to be a symbol or a silhouette from here on in and just hope for the best that some Parliamentary MP will not overturn her super injunction by naming her in the British Parliament.

It was far better being a bloke and then she remembered what it was like before-stalked by idiots here, there and everywhere. It was actually far safer for her to become a fish and then she remembered what had happened so that Shindo guy who was now at the bottom of the Marianas waiting for his 2014 court case.

So she bought a gun and began her own manhunt for the guys who keep writing about her.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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