Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Friday, 8 July 2011

image for Mystery Blonde In Alcohol Trafficking Scheme
A used pint of Discovery..

Residents in a west London suburb were on the lookout today after a mystery blonde was spotted taking part in what has been described as an "alcohol trafficking scheme."

Dave Handset, of Wavendon Avenue, Chiswick, was looking forward to a Friday afternoon celebration when the incident happened.

He says: "I like to hook up with a few mates of a Friday afternoon and celebrate the beginning of the weekend with a few refreshers, like.

"Well, we decided to meet up in the George the Fourth on the High Road at around 3pm. I got there a little early and decided to get one with it.

"Well, I'm waiting at the bar when this blonde comes up to me and says, 'What'll it be, hun?' I says, 'Pint of Discovery please," an' she goes off and pours a pint of Discovery and brings it to me takes a fiver off me and brings me change!

"I was well gobsmacked! Fancy an alcohol trafficking scheme operating on Chiswick High Road - and fancy a mystery blonde being involved!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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