Just when the News of the World bit the dust, it rose from the ashes as the Sunday Sun. All the bad things done by the NOW were put in limbo and hey presto! a new Sun was born.
Commenting on this transformation David Cameron said he had been shocked and sickened by the events leading up to the demise of the Sunday tabloid. Ken Clarke reminded him of the words of the blues song: 'Nobody knows you when you are down and out' but our David was in a jam having employed one of the former editors of the News of the World now facing arrest.
'I did know him' Cameron explained to his Tory friend 'but I don't know him anymore. He is down and out!'
Political Commentator Jim Slime explained 'Cameron has dealt with this issue badly. In the face of an Opposition hardly able to swat a fly he has throttled himself and tied himself in a knot at the same time.'
A well known fighter of lost causes who still backs the Monster Raving Loony Party has come to Cameron's assistance. Joshua Widdle, managing to avoid pissing on his own feet for the first time in years, suggested Cameron as a new prospect for him to fight a lost cause. 'He has what it takes' said Widdle 'Cameron has lost cause written all over him. He has my total support. I know a loser when I see one.'