Written by Deafo
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Monday, 4 July 2011

image for David Haye to continue breaking promises with Lib Dem role
A liar

David Haye is primed to continue breaking promises made to the nation after Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg said a job offer from his party was as inevitable as the 12-round hammering the boxer suffered at the hands Vladimir Klitschko on Saturday evening in Hamburg.

Haye is thought to have impressed senior party officials with his consummate failing of all those foolish enough to place faith in a single one of his pre-fight assurances, leading them to a firm offer of employment.

Party Leader Clegg stressed squandering the hopes of the British public in an extraordinarily poor fashion was just one of the many factors flagging the services of the vanquished party as being readily compatible with the Liberal Democrat's own doctrine.

He told reporters at Westminster, 'There's much more in common between us than just kicking dirt in the eye of our followers.'

'Just look at the prolonged delay David Haye's supporters experienced whilst waiting for him leave his changing room to take a centre stage he should never have had the opportunity of occupying.'

'The British electorate know that it is very much in keeping with the recent political history of the Lib Dem's.'

'As were his brash pre-fight proclamations that went on to prove as empty as the actions he would take once he found himself inside the ring to do the hard work of living up to your word, with the hopes of a nation at stake.'

Haye was enthusiastic at the prospect of being able to work with people as effusive with their braggadocio as himself.

'Tuition fee's, the NHS, David Haye…yeah that's got a nice ring to it.'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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