Written by Whitters
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Sunday, 3 July 2011

image for Train Operators follow London's Lead
Where the Mayor thinks he lives.

After the shock announcement from London Underground this weekend that its shedding 13 of its 51 Directors, Train Operators around the country are fighting to be first to say that they are following London's lead... like we do in everything else.

Transport for Boristown have announced that they are going to save in excess of £1.5 million a year by making the 13 directors redundant after informing the managers union MoneyMakers.web that their members will have to apply for ticket office vacancies and tube station dispatch jobs AND take the cut in pay in order to get a decent reference.

Sagecoach (as in Bus) and (Not usually) FistGroup have also followed suit this afternoon by announcing that they will be sacking 200 graduate managers saving around £10k a year in order to facilitate hiring said managers on inflated wages.

Owner of Sagecoach, Lord Souter of Scotland has decided to go on rare record with the following statement:

"I have spent many years cascading expensive new buses out of this country's only important conurbation when they reach 3 years old so that I can buy brand new buses and keep Boris Johnson happy.

"I hope that by doing a similar thing with railway managers and paying them obscene amounts of money to keep them from suing the Mayor of Boristown, I can get rid of these useless university geeks and get people in who have no idea how to run a railway."

Mayor of Boristown, Boris Johnson, declined to comment.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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