Written by queen mudder
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Topics: Kate Middleton, Acne

Saturday, 25 June 2011

image for Giant zit appears on Kate's temple
UK red tops tried airbrushing the pesky boil to spare readers from retching

Temple of the Mount, Windsore - Smothered in nearly an inch of industrial strength concealer make-up the huge pus-filled globule looked in imminent danger of bursting at today's medal handout ceremony.

It sprang up, crap circle-like, above her left brow as royal couple Wills and Kate handed out the Elizabeth Double Cross** to a hand-picked MoD crowd at Windsor Barracks.

Worried observers said this afternoon that a number of other irritating features about the newly elevated gold-digger's face are equally troubling.

"I counted her teeth," Slough Crematorium official Mrs Doris Crump commented, "and she's got at least 20 crammed in her upper jaw!

"Some sort of cruel trick by her orthodontics pal Sam Waley-Cohen perhaps!

"Still can't understand why they named her after that dreadful pub."

**Like the US gold double eagle - but made of iron pyrites.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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