Five thousand disgruntled potential British citizens are threatening to sue the Home Office after a pizza delivery boy mixed up the citizenship tests with several thousand GSCE exam papers.
It seems that the people were given GSCE papers, rather than 32 multiple choice question papers they had been expecting.
All of them were flummoxed when they had to prove the existence of the Beast of Bodmin and most of them went for safety by writing about Osama bin Laden. Some of those who were mathematically inclined were delighted to be given the GCSE Lower Tier maths exam when they were expecting random history questions.
Those who hated maths-and these comprise the bulk of those suing the Home Office- said that the test amounted to a form of racial profiling and thus contravened the European Bill of Rights. Those who intended to set up restaurants were also delighted when they sat the GCSE Food Technology which was delivered to them by mistake. Sure they were bemused to find there was no actual cooking involved and some were even more surprised to find that they had to plan a lepers dinner for thirty six-but no matter! They obviously expect to get good citizenship grades in August.
And what of the poor British 16 year old citizens who had sat the citizenship test by accident? It seems clear that most of them will be stripped of their UK citizenship later this July before being deported to back to Southern Russia, or wherever the hell they originated from in the first place.And what of the immigrants who took the GSCEs?
It seems that most of them will be adopted by the British parents who will soon see their own children deported in the very near future.