Written by Lady Godiva
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Wednesday, 15 June 2011

image for Birmingham residents told to be on look out for 'The Scarlet Spoofer' named so because he was seen wearing Man.United kit
Birmingham residents told to keep doors and windows locked

The residents of Birmingham have been told by the Police to be extra vigilant in locking up their homes and cars. Apparently a peeping tom, has been reported peeping through bedroom and bathroom windows. The peeping tom has been dubbed by police 'The Scarlet Spoofer' because he was spotted peeping through a bathroom window, wearing a Manchester United Home Kit.

When asked how they know the man in question is a Spoofer, Police spokesman, Bobby Helmut answered,

"Well, like, 'e leaves print-outs of Spoof Stories taped to windows he has peeped into. They're always written by the same 4 Spoof Writers so we may, indeed, be looking at a GANG. This 'as not, at these time, been ruled out as a pissibility. Yes I DID say pissibility"

Some residents of Birmingham have reported that their houses have been spray-painted with Spoof logos and a number of cats have returned home wearing outfits resembling those of some Spoofers crazy avatars. Although they find it quite amusing (the cat owners)...the people being peeped at are not as amused.

The Neighbourhood Watch patrols have been doubled until the Spoofer - or Spoofers is/are caught.

The Spoofers are believed to be harmless folk. Just a little bit bored with their lives and are looking for a few kinky kicks. It's believed (by someone who has an inkling who these guys are) that they are becoming a little bored with Spoofing alone and so have taken to the streets.

If you DO happen to see a wrinkled old man or two, wandering the streets at night wearing a Manchester United Kit, do not approach as they have very sharp tongues. Contact your closest police station or mental institution and give them the location then let them do their jobs.

Hopefully the homes and cats of Birmingham will soon be safe once more.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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