Written by Gabhan O'Buachalla
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Tuesday, 31 May 2011

image for Intelligent Chimp's Arse Explodes

Animal Rights activists are up in arms after George the Chimp was found dead in his cell at the Center for Simian Studies and Anthropology in Coventry.

Curious George was the first Chimp in captivity to figure out how to use basic kitchen implements to prepare food.

"George made a mean smoothie with milk chocolate and some strawberry's, he was making such progress too with the George Foreman Grill. He was even learning to cook a barbecue this Summer" - Dr. Heidi Dolittle

"Someone came in and gave George some Menthos and Coca Cola...when they mixed in George's stomach...the unthinkable happened, why would anyone do such a thing"

Police are following a definite line of enquiry, when menthos revealed a well known celebrity chef had ordered 100 boxes of menthos online.

The name of the chef is well known on twitter, however, a high court gagging order has prevented us revealing the chef's name.

A special episode of "Come Dine with Me" filmed before George's death will be aired this Friday.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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