Written by Monkey Woods
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Topics: Cucumbers

Tuesday, 31 May 2011

image for Spanish Cucumber Arrested At Dover
Don't be fooled by its look of innocence

A Spanish cucumber suspected of being involved in the deaths of 14 people in Germany and another in Sweden, has been arrested as it tried to enter the UK at Dover, Immigration officials have said.

The cucumber, green, had stowed itself in a crate of similar-looking cucumbers which was on its way to a market in Kent. It is reported to have put up no resistance when stopped by Immigration staff.

Port officials say this is a major breakthrough in the war against the Killer Cucumbers, although they say that they will remain vigilant until every member of the gang has been tracked down, and is safely behind bars.

A police spokesman who attended the scene said:

"This is just the tip of the iceberg. We know there are others, and we will be doing our utmost to find them before they kill again. If members of the public see a cucumber acting suspiciously, we would ask them not to approach it, but to notify the nearest police station, and officers will attend the scene with truncheons. We can't be too careful."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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