Written by Lady Godiva
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Friday, 20 May 2011

image for UK investigative reporter discovers that male television couch potatoes have been replaced by a group of males known as 'humour site crosswriters.'
Do you recognize this writer?

Recent studies conducted by England's highly respected Jane Johnson Institute of Journalistic Gender Disorders located in Wolverhampton, West Midlands has discovered a new male dysfunction.

This new affliction is unique for several reasons. First of all it appears by all accounts to be limited to the U.K.

A high ranking research study analyst with the Jane Johnson Institute, Sir Talbot McTalbot revealed that he interviewed a total of 690 writers who write for various Internet humor sites all based in the U.K. including the very popular Hardy Har Har Humour Site, the I Be Knackered Parody Pub Site, the Funny Bone In Me Pants Satire Site, and Giggles, Giggles, and Gobs of Giddy Giggles.

McTalbot found that one thing that all of these extremely popular British humour sites had in common was that most of the writers were elderly chaps 50 years and over, who were married, or who had once been married. They were all fairly intelligent, although by looking at some, one would wonder if they could actually recite the vowels...in the correct order.

McTalbot further noted that another common trait found in these Brits. was that everyone of them had an inordinately large amount of free time on their hands. Many reported that they spent so much time tapping away on their computer keyboard that they would actually forget to eat. Although they NEVER forget to DRINK, especially alcoholic beverages. They told McTalbot that these beverages lubricated their 'creative juices'.

One chap who resides in Leicestershire and who did not want his name used said that at first he started writing what are known as snippets. He then went on to writing news stories and soon found that he was writing stories about football. He said that he became so obsessed that he would actually type while dressed up in the uniform of his favorite player - Wayne Rooney, who plays for Manchester United.

The old chap writes under the name of Teddy Tippy Toes, a name he says he took from reading a book by noted courtroom drama author John Grisham. He confessed that soon he became so obsessed with writing his stories that he decided to make up a fake name in order to write more and more stories.

He looked on an Internet site under Fake user names and came up with the name Gigi Goal.

He did so well on the Writers Chart that he began to write under several more names. For some unknown reason he chose 'female' names.

Teddy Tippy Toes also became Bonnie Bollywood, Chelsea Manchester, and Sindy Scotch-on-the-Rocks.

After some prodding Teddy Tippy Toes admitted that when he writes using a fake female name he actually gets into the character going as far as actually putting on an Amy Winehouse wig, bright red lipstick, high heels, a bra, Katy Perry designer knickers, and an ankle bracelet.

McTalbot said that his research organization is hoping to convince Teddy Tippy Toes to allow them to study him and to find out exactly what has caused him to suddenly become a crosswriter or a transwriter if you will.

Apparently Teddy Tippy Toes has adamantly refused saying...'ey if it ain't broke - don't fix it eh?

Make Lady Godiva's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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