Written by Nae mair crap
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Topics: David Cameron

Wednesday, 11 May 2011

image for David Cameron invents Alternative Workers
I can do as much work as 10 real people

Unemployment in the UK is rising month by month and many office workers would be happy to take a post in 10 Downing Street. However, the UK Prime Minister, David Cameron has revealed a novel solution to the problem. He creates people.

A Mrs E Adams works in his communications office but does not pay Income Tax, National Insurance or Council Tax. She does not have a mortgage or pay rent, lucky person that she is. She has never had a holiday, has never been sick, does not eat or drink and has never voted at any election.

Mrs Adams has sent a letter to the Right Honourable, Sir Gerald Kaufman, MP for Manchester Gorton. The gentleman did not appreciate the tone of the letter, and, being an assiduous parliamentian, decided to make further enquiries of Mrs Adams.

She does not exist. She is a computer generated name. Is she perhaps, 1 of the reputed 400,000 new jobs created in the UK in the past year? What a great wheeze for David. We create names and it looks like we have many employees in Downing Street. Instead of the pared down, sacked back office workers signing the dole.

IT experts and working on a program to create a cyber Prime Minister and Cabinet. Cyborgs can't lie or mislead and have impeccable manners.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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