Prince William was unhappy to learn on his wedding night that his bride, Kate Middleton, was not a virgin. From the lobby pub of a local hotel, he complained vocally to other drinkers about his wedding night blues.
He told one one group of men with serious frustration, "I thought that there was supposed to be blood on the sheet tonight, but there isn't."
He then walked to a group of people playing darts and said "I asked her about it and she called me silly and said that I should know she's not a virgin."
William then walked to a man coming from the restroom and lamented "Sure, I've been banging her across the United Kingdom for ten years, but a shag is just a shag!"
Finally, the Prince sat in a stool and cried to the bartender, "She should have saved herself for our wedding night and not put out for me so much! I only married her because she was such a good lay, but she could have waited!"