Written by Monkey Woods
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Friday, 29 April 2011

image for Royal Wedding Was Planned With Hitler In Mind
Well-wishers in good voice at dawn today

It's here! At last, after all the months of build-up and nervous excitement, the day of the Royal Wedding of Prince William and his beautiful bride Kate Middleton has finally arrived, and not before time!

Or, as some might say, one day before time. One day, that is, before the anniversary of one of the Prince's biggest heroes, former German Chancellor, Adolf Hitler, who died on 30th April 1945.

Hitler, faced with capture by the Russians who were slowly closing in on his bunker in the Reich Chancellery, chose to shoot himself with his Walther PPK 7.65 mm pistol, also the preferred weapon of secret agent James Bond, another one of William's heroes.

Of all the dates in the calendar on which to get married, William would dearly have loved to have tied the knot on the date of Hitler's death, but it falls on a Saturday, and Royal Weddings have to be on a Friday, to give the peons a day off work.

The Prince had wanted to trun up for the ceremony in full Nazi regalia, but the Queen advised against this, due to current poor public opinion over the Royal family.

As was reported earlier, the Prince and Kate have already been married behind closed doors in a ceremony held on Hitler's birthday, the 20th April, to avoid any terrorist nuisancing.

The wedding today is merely for the cameras and the hundreds of millions of well-wishers who will line the route to Westminster Abbey chanting "Sieg Heil!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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