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Friday, 22 April 2011

image for British people too thick to understand AV claims senior Conservative
British electorate is way too stupid to be trusted with Alternative Vote.

A senior Conservative and supporter of the 'No to AV Campaign' has gone on record as saying that the British electorate is way too stupid to be trusted with a complex voting system like the Alternative Vote.

Conservative Party whip Sir Quentin Smyth-Fortnym, said:

"Have you met the electorate? I have. Most of them can't be trusted to tie their own shoe-laces let alone complete a ballot paper. They stumble into the polling station, dragging their knuckles along the floor, they grunt monosyllabically at the polling officer before collect their voting paper. They can barely hold the pencil properly, because they haven't evolved opposable thumbs yet. You only have to watch the strain on their faces with the effort of trying to figure out how to scrawl a barely legible cross on the ballot paper. With AV, you are asking a bunch of Troglodytes who are barely numerate to rank the candidates 1,2,3. It will be chaos!"

Sir Quentin also expresses concerns over the amount of words required to explain the voting system.

"You really expect these people to read 300 words? You have to beat the information into them with a big stick! It's the only language these people understand."

When asked which way people should vote on May 5th Sir Quentin said:

"Vote? Get down in the cellar and darn my socks, poor person!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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