Written by queen mudder
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Wednesday, 13 April 2011

image for Eight-foot portrait of nude in chains 'looks like News of the World hackette Rebekah Brooks'
A bit like this but minus the demonic add-ons

London - Entitled 'Flamin' Allegory' the painting shows a ruddy-haired near-naked woman chained to rocks 'like some feminist Prometheus'.

In the background ominous Leonardo Da Vinci-style Virgin on the Rocks monoliths partially obscure a burning oil rig - that bears a more than a passing resemblance to the Gulf of Mexico's Deepwater Horizon stack.

The picture has been shortlisted for the £25,000 BP-sponsored 'Sign of the Times' Portrait Award at the National Portrait Gallery.

Manchester artist Louis Smith has yet to confirm the name portrait model and wouldn't be drawn on whether the News of the Screws CEO sat starkers for him.

According to legend Prometheus was 'clamped to a rock in the Caucasus' for betraying the secrets of the gods to men.

"Sounds like another Sunday Smearer phone hacking scandal unfolding," gallery janitor Dave Snodgrass said today.

Ross Kemp is 69.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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