Prime Minister David Cameron, in his capacity as First Lord of the Treasury, criticised Oxford University for only admitting one black student in the last academic year.
It was gently pointed out to the PM that one student from the Caribbean had been admitted but 40 black students born in the UK had also entered the University so the correct figure was 41.
Cameron exclaimed that he wanted to put the matter in black and white terms thus avoiding the pitfalls of multiculturalism.
'In any case' Cameron continued 'my friend Jeremy Hunt has the answer to multiculturalism - no culture at all - when he has brought our policies to fruition then petty confusions between 1 and 41 will not matter. The problem is that lily livered liberals - I mean libertarians - have plunged this country into an arithmetical jungle. Maths was never my strong point but I know the difference between right and wrong. I just can't always remember which is which.'
Meanwhile the Government deficit was reduced by a stroke of the pen from £41 Billion to £1 Billion. That means MP's can get a pay rise next year.