Written by MonkeyInTheBath
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Topics: Death, Reggae

Wednesday, 30 March 2011

image for Police under suspicion for reggae star's death
Happy Ranker's other brother, Yora

80s reggae musician Happy Ranker died this month during a police raid on his flat in the gritty east end of Bournemouth. He released two little known songs in the early 1980s called "Dat Good Ranking" and "Let Me Rank All Over Yo Face, Bitch". Fans and family are suspicious about the official police explanation over the circumstances of his death.

Happy's brother Complete had this to say: "Da police came round to his house. Dey say he had drugs on him. But come on man, he was a celebrity, a reggae musician and a native Jamaican. Why on earth would he have any drugs wit' 'im?"

A police spokesman refuted claims that Happy had been stabbed by police officers during the raid. "It's not our MO. We would have beaten him to death instead."

The investigation continues.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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