Written by dutch
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Topics: ed Miliband

Wednesday, 30 March 2011

image for "Geeky" Ed Miliband To Wed But Brother David Will NOT Be Best Man
How The Mighty Have Fallen

Geeky Labour leader Ed Miliband is set to marry in May. However, he has not asked brother David to be his best man and is not having one at all.

Cynical political journalists are saying the wedding is just 'a stunt' to please any old 'fuddy duddies who do not agree with co-habitation before marriage.

His personal life caused a lot of unwelcome derision when it was revealed 'too busy' to go and have his name as father on his kids birth certificates.

It caused his aides to go 'crazy' when he said that he was 'too busy' at a climate change conference in Copenhagen to go to the registry office.

He has come across as nerdy and clever but lacking in warmth and humanity and has an almost 'Spock-like' autism when it comes to relating to other people.

Fragrant Samantha Cameron and her beautiful daughter's birth was a triumph for the Conservatives who 'milked it' for all it was worth. Cameron even called his daughter Florence 'Endillion' in tribute to the pretty Cornish hamlet his family were holidaying at the time of her birth.

By contrast the Milibands' bohemian approach has been viewed as 'lacklustre' by comparison. Justine is a working mum and does not want to be a 'political wife'. She reluctantly had a makeover and had her hair highlighted when Ed got the gig as Labour leader.

Ed has now been coerced by the party faithful into marrying and coming across as being as 'normal' as possible and as a really enthusiastic daddy.

The unconventional life style of the Milibands' diluted their appeal to the public. Upon coming into office his declaration that he was an agnostic did not auger well for him. He had been brought up as a Jew and it appeared 'weird' that he was claiming not to 'believe' in God.

The wedding is sure to increase his popularity and he has been bombarded by celebrity magazines asking if they can do an 'exclusive' photo-shoot at the upcoming nuptials.

He was heard in a 'dorky' greasy spoon restaurant confiding in Ed Balls that the whole 'wedding thing' was getting totally out of hand and that he was getting 'cold feet'.

It is rumoured by those in the know that Ed is tempted 'to do a runner' to escape the whole 'wedding charade'. He is only doing it to keep up with the Camerons' and try and appear a 'family guy' with cute photogenic kids. Even 'mighty' Gordon Brown went down the conventional route and married and then had kids in wedlock. It was moving to see his two lovely sons and his pretty wife leaving 10 Downing Street holding hands like a perfect 'nuclear family'.

Let us hope that 'geeky Ed' can get his act together and set a good example of family life to the electorate. He needs to play the 'happy family' card to increase his popularity with the ordinary person on the street who is struggling to 'make ends meet.'

It has been speculated that a 'bitter feud' has caused a rift between the Miliband brothers and mummy Miliband is on David's side. There does not seem to be much 'sweetness and light' in his bohemian family.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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