Written by Ellis Ian Fields
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Friday, 25 March 2011

image for Cameron And Clegg To Fight It Out Over Boiled Eggs
Questions in the House?

Prime Minister David Cameron and his deputy, Nick Clegg, are to develop an artificial argument so as to appear less "together."

The move follows an open-microphone gaffe after a question-and-answer session in Nottingham yesterday. Clegg was heard to a to say "If we keep doing this we won't find anything to bloody disagree on in the bloody TV debate."

Although he later dismissed the comment as "banter" some Liberal Democrats are genuinely concerned that the pair never disagree on anything.

In a leaked memo from LibDem HQ advisors have come up with an answer.

"Suggest PM moves law that boiled eggs should be broken at the big end. Nick can oppose and argue it makes more sense for the economy for boiled eggs to be smashed at narrow end.

"Idea is taken from some old book we read once, but given thick nature of electorate, they won't know any better.

"Debate can be seen to show differences between Dave and Nick, but not be important enough to break coalition.

"Tories on board - as long as they can be 'big enders.' Suggest agreement."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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