Written by Gary Potter
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Monday, 21 March 2011

image for BBC angers atheist fanatics!
A real genuine honest to goodness missing link. Missing.

Following on from yesterdays expose which showed that the BBC, generously funded by the public, is manically anti-religion, it seems that good old auntie beeb has upset the very people they were pandering to, the atheists.

Atheists do not believe in an Almighty creator God, but do believe that frogs really do turn into princesses if given enough time.

Richard Dawkins, atheist fundamentalist, was up in arms following a recent Bible so called investigation programme. The programme, presented by fellow atheist Dr Fransesco Stavrakopoulou was attempting to cast doubts on the Biblical account of the kingdom of David, using archeology as its main argument. However, Dawkins soon realised the terrible blunder that the BBC had made.

Dawkins realised that archeology is the only remaining wobbly hope of ever finding the legendary 'missing links' and thus the only chance of ever providing any evidence whatsoever for the myth of evolution. In a leaked email to the BBC, Dawkins fumed:

"Don't you realise what you've done? By placing unwarrented emphasis on requiring archeological evidence, you have completely exposed the fact that evolution has no empirical basis whatsoever! Since Darwin, we have searched in vain for evidence that man evolved from primal soup, and if we too rely on archeology as a decider, we have nothing at all to cling to, as the fabled missing links are alas, very much still missing.

Genetic studies have proven beyond any doubt that genomes do not miraculously gain complexity by magic or accident, and i'm sorry to say that mutations are completely harmful to species as the evacuation in light of the Japan nuclear emergency is proving. I am now going to have to try and prove a negative again by writing 'The God Delusion 2: Still Angry'. On the upside, i'll make a fortune from my 'intellectual' atheist disciples!"

In a panicked response the BBC has decided to cancel the upcoming series of 'Strictly Come Dancing', 'Merlin', and 'Dr.Who'. It will now channel funds into yet another computer generated pseudo documentary "Walking with Imaginary but neccessary creatures for evolution to be true". To be narrated by evolution zealot David Attenborough, the programme will feature guest appearences by Justin Beiber, a barely clothed Kelly Brook, George Clooney and others in an attempt to attract and brainwash as many people as possible.

A planned festive special on the tragic consequences of radition exposure and mutations has also had to be shelved following Dawkins outburst. Instead a new adventure costume drama 'SuperMutants in Candleford' showing the benefits of nuclear radiation is in the pipeline. Like the incredible Hulk, the show will propogate the ridiculous notion that radiation somehow improves organisms, rather than revealing the rather less happy fact that exposure of even small amounts of radiation can result in tragic consequences.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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