Written by IainB
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Topics: Socks, Derek Acorah

Friday, 11 March 2011

image for Derek Acorah pictured wearing odd socks
Some say Socky the Sock Helper lives in Acorah's drawer

Magnificent Liverpudlian Psychic with the distinguished (and full bodied) head of hair, Derek Acorah, was pictured leaving his home in Southport today wearing odd socks.

Acorah's aide, Eric D'Accord, laughed off the whole incident.

"Derek is trying out a new Parisian trend of wearing unmatched socks," said D'Accord. "It will be the new spring fashion in Paris this summer, you watch. The dead fashion designer Gianni Versace told Derek this only last night."

However, Acorah watchers, who are legion, believe that Acorah has instead adopted a new sock selection method when he dresses.

"We think," said Frederick MacAbre, the unelected head of Watching Acorah, "that all his socks are kept in singles in his draw, and he allows the paranormal forces to guide his hand and allow him to select a matching pair."

According to the conspiracy theory, on days when Acorah's socks match, he is at the height of his powers, and on days when they are unmatched his powers are at their lowest ebb.

"You can believe either," said D'Accord, "they both show how powerful Del's paranormal powers are."

"My own personal theory," said James Randi, arch nemesis of Acorah and the only man with Psychic Skeptic as his occupation on his passport, "is that the man is a buffoon."

Which ever theory people subscribe to is a personal choice, but the fact remains that even in mismatched socks (one was red and blue striped the other was Argyle) Derek Acorah is still the most fashionable conduit to the other side.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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