Trade union leaders today threatened to strike if the government pushes ahead with changes to public sector pensions.
A spokesman said, "It's not fair that bankers get huge bonuses, while we have to make to do with our poor salaries and pensions."
He continued. "Also it's not fair that lifeguards get to sit around on the beach all day, while us office workers have to stay indoors at a desk."
"It's not fair that porn stars get to have sex at work all day, but we just have to make do with a quick fiddle in the toilets."
"It's not fair that astronauts get to go into space, whereas most of us are lucky if we get a trip to another office in a grim looking town."
"Basically it's not fair that we all have crappy jobs. It's not as if we chose them."