Written by Griff
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Saturday, 26 February 2011

Mr William Hague has issued a new directive after the evacuation fiasco of the UK nationals from Tony Blair's friend Gadaffi anarchic state. In a brief statement Hague stated the new criteria to be rescued from a country if British Citizens were in danger through war or national disaster.

Hague stated that the rules are simple and will avoid any confusion.

They state that evacuees must:

- be a conservative party member.
- have gone to Eton or Oxford
- never have gone to Westminster Public School
- be able to drink 25 pints of Bombshell Ale before breakfast.

"I urge all British people who are moving abroad to register the above information with the Conservative Party headquarters along with a yearly fee of £25,000."

No labour MP was available for comment unless they were paid £5000 cash in hand so they didn't have to declare it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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