Written by Skoob1999
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Topics: Police, Crime

Friday, 25 February 2011

image for Beware Of Armed Men Wearing Boiler Suits And Balaclavas - Police Warn
Move Along Now! The Police Earlier Today.

The police today warned members of the public to be a bit wary should they encounter armed men wearing boiler suits and balaclavas. A police statement alleged that armed men thus attired were highly unlikely to be popping up the shops for a daily paper and a pint of milk.

In fact, they are statistically far more likely to set about the windows of a jewellery store with sledgehammers, or be about to attack a security van with sawn off shotguns.

The police have apparently studied the behaviour of armed men wearing boiler suits and balaclavas and concluded that the public should be extremely wary of such men, as they are prone to committing acts of violence in order to nick a few quid.

In some cases, extreme violence, such as shooting people in the legs, or clubbing anybody in their way with pick-axe handles has occurred.

The police warn the public to beware of such men, and if possible, cross the road to the other side. That's all. Now go on. Move along. There's nothing more to see here.

More as we get it.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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