A Kendal based cobbler has expressed his extreme dissatisfaction at the way the internet - and particularly satirical websites - appear to be focusing disproportionately on socks.
Siegfried Bassoon, of BassoonShoesIncLtd PLC.com.co.UK/nigeria.con complained that in the goldfish bowl like world of satirical websites, socks were taking a far higher proportion of reader hits than shoes.
And in his opinion, such a trend is not only bad for business; it's bad for his internet profile, and it's also grossly unfair.
Mr Bassoon complained that, as shoes and sandals came along well before 65% polyester socks were ever invented, shoes should take precedence in the pecking order - arguing that were it not for the invention of shoes and sandals, socks would never have existed.
"I mean," he complained miserably. "Just look at the evidence. If not for shoes, socks would never have been invented. These fly by night hosiers are just taking the piss really. If we didn't have shoes, there'd be no point whatsoever in having socks. It would just be a big waste of time."
Ho Chi Li of Socks Rack countered:
"He's just bitter. In my organisation, we are man (or woman, or even transsexual) enough to admit that shoes are a vital fashion accessory, but the cobblers big themselves up way too much. Shoes are shoes, but a good quality 65% polyester sock is a friend for life."
Here at Skoob News, quite frankly, we have no feelings one way or the other. We just hope that the shoe/sock rivalry doesn't get too nasty.
More as we get it.