David Cameron today confirmed that Tony Montana would be employed by the government in a drive to increase import and export figures for the UK.
The self styled Cuban Mafia Man is said to have accepted the role that Lord Alan Sugar was un-able to accept. The PM said.
"In the current economic climate, it is important to remember that we need strong individuals to bring the best possible deal to the UK. As many have speculated (David chuckles) that we have been in touch with Montana Holdings, only today have we been able to reveal the proposition put forward by either party, due to legal technicalities.
After these truly historic talks today, Montana Holdings have agreed to take over all imports of illicit narcotics into the country. Tony is quoted as saying "Heroin is the new Yeyo". Not only will this be a blow to home grown organized crime, but it will also be a great boon for the UK air industry. Tony shares Margaret Thatcher's ideology for free enterprise"
But when prompted on the possible influx of guns, often associated with such Corporations, the PM said.
"Tony and Angel have agreed that all surplus arms will be directed to up and coming warzones. Montana holdings are only interested in good business. Just like the Tory government."
But spoof reporter Masheded managed to interview Tony Montana on his way to his limousine. He said.
"Yo Angel, who is this fucking guy? I thought you were suppose to be my security you fkin hussar..Ok Chico what is it you need?"
Masheded went on to explain the Medias interest in the recent Multi National deal, but Tony interrupted saying.
"Journalist? Whoever said you were a journalist? Have a nice trip."
Tony Blair refused to comment.