Written by Inhopeless
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Friday, 18 February 2011

LONDON - After David Cameron strongly reinforced his BigSoc idea, while in the face of severe cuts, has caused many commentators to say that the people will 'do less with even less', prompting a dig around by this reporter at Cameron's secondary school.

The results are astonishing. Shit. I got more marks on my GCSE Maths than he did. Holy crap.

"You see," said this reporter's political expert, his friend Bob, "having failed Maths, although we're dealing with arbitrary numbers, Cameron has failed to work out that less money does not mean more output. Quite the opposite. You see, cutting funding to the services that Cameron is trying to support is rediculous."

Cameron was also found to have failed Modern World History, after a blunder last year when he said that Britain was a 'junior partner' in World War Two.

In a press conference yesterday, Cameron said, "I may have failed two crucial subjects. Luckily, I got a A in Drama and Acting." That A should become useful in the future.

This has been Benny Fold, political correspondent, because Inhopeless is too damn lazy to use his own name.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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