Written by Mr Goster
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Topics: Sexism

Tuesday, 15 February 2011

image for Virgin Cabin Crew Most Attractive
The Gaffer

There was outrage today from certain circles when once again Virgin Airlines Cabin Crews were voted the most attractive by flyers.

Spokesman for Independent Airline 'UBBWP' (Ugly Buggers But We're Polite) voiced his anger at a Press Conference this morning.

'It's all very well having fancy models poncing around in lip gloss and tights, spending fortunes on silly TV ads. Most people couldn't care less whether the person who looks after them has no teeth, dandruff and breath like a wet weasel. All they want is quality service whilst on their flights. great service, minimum fuss. It's not about eye candy and titillation. Which is where Independent companies like us come in. We employ some of life's less fortunate looking people, real people, that passengers look at and don't feel inadequate. It puts them in a good mood and ready for their holiday or business trip. Remember, the customer comes first.'

Newly appointed Head Of Operations at Virgin, Andy Gray disagreed.

'Total rubbish that man's talking. You want Top Totty, plenty of cleavage, short tight skirts, beautiful. They've got to know their place these girls. And here at Virgin they know just how it should be. I should have joined years ago. I'm making my Virgin Flight debut tomorrow actually, along with the new captain, Richard Keys, should be a right jolly.'

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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