Written by Charpa93
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Sunday, 13 February 2011

image for Kate Middleton Claims Camilla Already Acting like Wicked Stepmother
The floors here are exceptionally clean.

In a candid interview late last month, Kate Middleton, fiancée of Prince William of Wales, discussed what she expects her life to be like once she has married into the royal family. Her initial response was "fabulous!" but then a frown crossed her face and she was asked to elaborate on what could possibly be bothering her.

"Oh nothing," she replied. "It's just that when I signed up for a Cinderella wedding, I had no idea that I would get it, warts and all." Upon further prodding, Miss Kate went on to explain that her relationship between her and her future mother-in-law made her think of the wicked stepmother in the fairytale.

"Nothing I do is ever enough," said Kate. "When we dine together, I must wait until Camilla has been seated first. When Will and I are making out in the grand ballroom, I am chastised as a commoner, and when I want to play my Sex Pistols CD in the library, while miss high and mighty Camilla is reading Wuthering Heights for the hundredth time, I am all but banished to my quarters where I'm not allowed to have my own CD player."

Asked if her behavior may be at all a bit un-princess-like, Kate replied, "The way I see it, I'm gonna be more of a royal princess, nay queen, than that royal pain-in-the-bum."

Kate was, of course, referring to the fact that although Camilla is married to Prince Charles who is in line to succeed the throne of King, her title would not officially be Queen, but rather she would remain Her Royal Highness The Princess Consort. However, when Prince William eventually succeeds the throne of King, then Kate Middleton would be crowned Queen.

"Of course," said Middleton, with distinct melodramatic flair, "none of this really matters much at all when I'm asked daily if I've finished scrubbing the floors."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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