Written by Mr Goster
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Thursday, 10 February 2011

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valentine treat

With Valentine's Day fast approaching it's time again for all the big supermarkets to cash in and rip people off.

First in were Marks & Spencer who are offering a beautiful 3 course romantic dinner for two lovebirds for only £20. Spokesman for the company, Frank Spencer said, 'We do this every year and make a fortune, there's loads of gullable couples out there who think Valentine's day is a proper day. '

Not to be outdone, food giant Sainsbury's joined in, offering a lovely 3 course lovebird meal for £15! Including Lemon crumble!

Owner Dave Sainsbury said, 'If M&S think they can rip people off without any competition they can forget it. We'll run them out of town this Valentine day, £5 cheaper we are!'

Food scams like this can quickly get out of hand as the giant corporates try to outdo each other so it's always nice when every now and again, a smaller independent gets involved and shows how it should be done.

Enter Barry Shuttleworth from Northern Foods to take up the story.

'We're a small family concern with 3 shops, one in Barnsley, one in Preston and one in Bolton, so we've got Yorkshire and Lancashire pretty much covered. We're doing a Valentine special, romantic meal for 2 which includes any 2 pasties or pies, a cup of soup each, and a chocolate eclair, for £3. We can't cope, absolutely mobbed out. That's proper value for money. '

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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