Written by j.w.
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Topics: Cats

Monday, 7 February 2011

image for Kitten Stolen Shock
Stolen Pussy

Christine Hemming, the redoubtable wife of Liberal Democrat M.P., John Hemming has pleaded not guilty to stealing the pussy of her husband's lover, Emily Cocks who is Hemming's favourite researcher.

Cocks is the mother of a child with John Hemming, MP for Birmingham Hardly, which was born in 2005.

This affair has been going on for some time and the pussy theft is only the latest example of a suspected disagreement resulting from the triangular relationship.

Hemming had his car scratched by the same pussy at an earlier date and his expenses show he bought a cat flap, at public expense so the pussy could get in and out of his house when she wanted to.

Hemming has always taken a vigourous stance on Women's Rights and is devestated by the effect his affair is happening. 'Liberals should be able to cope with changing agendas and people changing their minds. You must remember my pledge to be faithful to my wife was before we joined the Coalition. After finding out the mess the Labour Pary had left for us to clean up I realised my pledge had been a mistake.'

But will the constituents of Birmingham Hardly see it that way?

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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