Written by j.w.
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Topics: Stupid, Birds, Brain

Saturday, 5 February 2011

image for Bird Brains Smaller
The Tragedy of Bird Brain Disease

People suffering from the disease known as 'bird brain' have been shown to have 5% smaller brains than normal.

The cause of bird brain disease (flutter oiseaux minimus) is unknown but there are several pointers which could explain it.

Brains are known to leak and can dribble down the spinal cord to be collected in small boils that have to be surgically removed. Also brains can be 'fried' in constantly hot weather - steam emerges from the victim's ears and they feel drowsy. A spell in a fridge can help to deal with this problem.

However the alarming situation has arisen whereby Professor Ingleboard Twit, having spent years studying 'Bird Brain' disease has forgotten where he put all his findings. It is feared that he deleted the results of year's of painstaking research in a rush of blood to his head.

Some scientists fear that this could show that bird brain disease is catching, which would mean the study of the condition would put researchers at risk.

Although this disease is serious increasing brain size is always fatal. With this terrible condition heads burst open because of the pressure and strange thoughts circulate - a theory that this is the root cause of the flying saucer phenomenon has been suggested.

The answer to both bird brain disease and exploding brains is unthinkable and involves removal of an area of the body.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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