The Government has asked Jeremy Hunt to head up a Commission of the future to be called 'Ignorance is Bliss'.
There are several strands to this new policy which will be popular with the electorate and ensure a Tory Government for the rest of time.
Firstly Hunt will gradually close all libraries in Britain. 'These places are a waste of time and money' he declared 'they are filled with layabouts and people who should be at work'. The Government policy will be : 'If you want a book - buy it! If you want an education read the 'Sun' and the 'News of the World'.' People will be able to use the internet at cafes which will be present in every High Street. 'If you want to go on the Internet - pay for it!' will be the clarion call.
Next, not quite so gradually the BBC will be eradicated. 'If you want radio or TV pay for it!' is to be the slogan. The new TV station 'Dog' will be the flagship of the expanding Murdoch Empire. Rupert Murdoch announced his plans for Hunt to broadcast: 'The aim of 'Dog News' will be to instil discipline into the shambles that Labour left for us to clear up.'
An unkind cat lover snarled: 'More Dog shit for everyone to tread in!'
Hunt is expanding further into the Environment. 'No more getting lost in forests' he beamed 'we will cut the trees down and build Fun Palaces for all the family to enjoy.'
Hunt also has Universities on his Agenda. 'Far too many Universities and students who are far too radical' he complained. 'We will keep only the best, Oxford and Cambridge, turning the others into American Football stadiums.'
To cries of 'Ignorance is Bliss!' Hari Krishna zealots pranced outside Parliament and cheered Hunt as he passed by on his way to pass the legislation to bring in the new dawn of civilisation.