Written by grimbo
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Thursday, 3 February 2011

A Parliamentary group for stressed out Liberal Democrat members of the Coalition Government is to be launched tonight, with Vince Cable as its President.

The group, named FreakingOut, was created with the advice of famed psychiatrist Dr Milton Bernstein and is the first in a series of "equality network groups" to be launched in Parliament, although no details have been released about the others.

Its understood, however, that one of the next target groups may be MPs who formerly supported the Iraq war.

Bernstein called FreakingOut a "fantastic and welcome opportunity" to help dismantle "barriers preventing Lib Dem MPs carrying out their parliamentary duties to the best of their ability". The group will provide "mutual support" and a mentoring programme aimed at building up Lib Dems' self esteem to such an extent that they should soon be able to appear in public without wearing a disguise and even attend public events without arriving via the back door.

Dr Bernstein did, however, stop short of promising that any of the affected MPs would ever be able to look themselves in the mirror again. "We're not miracle workers", he concluded.

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