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Monday, 31 January 2011

image for Morris Dancers Protest Imposition of Gang ASBOs
Angry Dancer Protests LibDem Colours Theft

Morris dancers throughout the country reacted angrily today to the Home Office announcement that courts would now be able to use gang ASBOs to curtail the activities of roaming bands of morris men.

"It's unbelievable," foamed George Caper-Hey, waving his tankard of Old Scroatem to emphasise his point.

"It's not enough that we've had to band together to fight the rising tide of political infiltration - after all, who gave UKIP permission to use Ducklington's ribbons? Not us, that's for sure!

"We've had to cope with stratospheric beer prices, licenses for dancing in public, complaints about bells, you name it.

"And now they've got gang ASBOs which will prevent morris dance sides from entering town centres, wearing our team colours and being seen in public with a hobby horse.

"It's the last straw. If they carry on like this, the only truly British tradition left will be whingeing about the weather."

Spokesmen from the four major political parties declined to comment, although the UKIP spokesman did blame the seasonal cold spell on EU regulations.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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