The sale of forest land has attracted opposition from unexpected quarters -
A Mr Gump, 49, said 'Ah guess ah'll have to find a new name… Devastation, maybe.'
Frodo Baggins, eleventy-three, said 'Middle Earth will never be the same again. Selling the Shire to Saruman will annoy Gandalf no end.
A middle aged man, six feet tall, bald, distinctive marks on skull, who wished to remain anonymous, claimed to represent the 'Doggers Front'. 'These secluded forest car parks are essential to our activities' he said, nervously trying to conceal the name 'Brian' tattooed on his right hand.
Sources close to the government were too busy buying shares to comment.