Lights were ablaze in the Home Office as officials are panicked that two MI6 agents working under the covers in Egypt are now listed as 'missing' after messages in their 'dead drops' located in a Cairo luggage store have gone uncollected!
A source at Al-Jajeer, now officially off the air due to a government mandate during the riots in Egypt, said the two were last seen involved in a 'heated' argument with a militant member of the Muslim Brotherhood who owned a small B&B.
According to witnesses in the formerly quiet neighborhood, the pair of Brits were threatening the owner of the establishment with a civil lawsuit over his refusal to let them
'hole up' until the riots had calmed.
The proprietor insistently told them that it was against his religious beliefs to let 2 people of the same sex sleep in the same bed, but apparently the lads would have none of it!
Facebook friends of the spooks, identified on their home pages only as "Sean" and "Percy", had been in service for the intelligence arm of the government since gays were mandated to be engaged in super secret operations despite security concerns, by the European Council of Ministers.
Reportedly the pair were in Egypt to help facilitate the stealthy removal by wheelie bag of current President Hosni Mubarak using the ruse that the carryall was not to be searched due to immunity under their official diplomatic passports.
English tabloids are having a field day now linking the two missing Brits with former MI6
agent Gareth Williams found trussed up in a carryall fully insured and waiting for a FedX pickup for a flight to Moscow. Williams was found dead at the time of discovery and unable to contribute information on the incident, which remains unsolved.
Pub mates at the "Pink Sausage" outside of London, said the three were part of a chess club that met every Thursday to engage in spirited matches involving both black & white Queens , Knights , and the occasional errant Bishop.
Barreness (sic) Cathy Ashton, drawing $500K a year on the EU council, said that she was aware of the situation and taking it on as a priority.
"One can't have this," she reportedly barked over cocktails at an embassy meet and greet,
"I have directed the Council to look into prosecuting the owner of the B&B and levying a heavy fine for this breach of Human Rights against consenting adults in the service of her Majesty"
Ashton also said she was canceling her cruise to the Nile and shore excursions to visit the Pyramids, deciding instead, she said, "to visit the friendlier confines of Argentina where nobody cares who you sleep with!"
President of Argentina, Cristina Fernandez de Kirchner, upon hearing the veiled insult referring to her recent husband, Nestor, who died at 106 and left her President, immediately cut off diplomatic relations with Britain and was said to be putting together an invasion force to retake the Falklands 'and get rid of all those fags and goat F*****rs!"
Kim Philby would have been 99 this month.
More as Davie & Nickie 'get it."