Written by DonStants
Rating:

Share/Bookmark
Print this

Tuesday, 25 January 2011

Kenneth Tong wade into the Sky Sports row yesterday after commenting that women can "become assistant referees, as long as they're skinny".

Both Richard Key and Andy Gray have been much maligned for numerous sexist comments, including Key allegedly remarking that assistant referee Sian Massey should make him "a fucking omelette" whilst refereeing the Liverpool-Wolverhampton game on Saturday. Gray, meanwhile, has just been sacked from Sky for making grunting "pig-like" noises at various female presenters, although regular listeners to his commentary know that it could be simply his voice.

Mr Tong meanwhile, famous for being a spoilt aristocrat, reality contestant, and overall twat, made his comments a mere two weeks after he somewhat controversially advocated the idea of women starving themselves. In a bizarre attempt to appear genuine and, well, normal, Mr Tong exclaimed

"I totally deplore the things Richard Key and Andy Gray said. I honestly feel that women can manage to assist a referee, providing they appear sexy whilst doing so. I mean, like, no-one wants to see some fat chick do it, do they?"

Mr Tong's blunder comes after several recent mishaps in his attempts to defend his diabolical views, including "but everyone loves starving people" and "only skinny women are famous- look at Mother Teresa and Anne Frank." Mr Tong then tweeted that "I am not a bad person- if people want to know my true nature, they can ask my friends"- before retracting said tweet upon the realisation that he didn't actually have any.

Mr Tong isn't the only person whose comments have been met with raised eyebrows concerning this issue. Italian President Silvio Berlusconi yesterday remarked that "lady referees should have the right to blow my penis any time they please", before realising his mistake and exclaiming, "Whistle!! I meant whistle!"

Make DonStants's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you fancy trying your hand at comedy spoof news writing, click here to join!

Print this

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.



Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.




Share/Bookmark

Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Email:

What's 4 multiplied by 4?

8 21 17 16

Go to top