Written by queen mudder
Print this

Sunday, 23 January 2011

image for Christopher Jefferies: My Scapegoat Hell
Jefferies resents public ridicule about his dodgy haircut, clothes and teeth

Bristol - (Dog Eat Dog): Fears he grassed up Dutch architect Vincent Tabak have seen Chris Jefferies demand police protection.

The weedy-looking ex-Clifton College teacher apparently told friends he's a nervous wreck after Ordeal by Red Top and public innuendo.

Officially Jefferies is not yet off the hook as the police hunt continues for accomplices, false alibis 'and that missing pizza'.

But he's ignored heartfelt pleas for a radical makeover of a decent haircut, proper suit and visit to a cosmetic dentist.

Bail conditions also mean he can't talk to the press or defend himself via third parties until all the murky details are sent to the CPS.

Late this evening police sources hinted they may have to bulldoze the entire Canynge Road property following a tip-off about a previous, paedophile resident.

Jefferies bought the garden apartment from him and let it to Yeates and her boyfriend Greg Reardon.

But the perv's love of digging around in herbaceous borders and his peculiar pansy planting hobby may see the Jefferies'-owned flat excavated for evidence.

Vincent Tabak's girlfriend Tanja Morson has vanished off the radar.

Make queen mudder's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story

Stop - Warning

The story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature.

This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

To confirm you have acknowledged this warning, and wish to continue to read the article, please click the following link.

Otherwise, please click here to go back to the home page.


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 2 multiplied by 4?

2 21 20 8
69 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more